Counting My Blessings: #9
Posted on | December 1, 2008 | No Comments
Just in case you’ve missed any of them, here are my earlier posts in this thread:
- Blessing #1 — Connection to Nature and Universal Truths
- Blessing #2 — The Husband
- Blessing #3 — My Health
- Blessings #4 and 5 — My Children
- Blessing #6 — My Circumstances
- Blessing #7 — The Husband’s Health
- Blessing #8 — My Mom
Today’s blessing — The Husband’s four adult children.
The Husband has three sons and one daughter from his first marriage. He also has five grandchildren.
The youngest of his first batch of sons has Down’s Syndrome. J* is a blessing in and of himself as he is undoubtedly the least judgmental and most loving person I’ve ever encountered. The Son, years ago when he was just starting to figure out for himself that the older brother he’d grown up loving was “different”, announced that God had made J* “so full of love” that there simply wasn’t room enough left in him for the other, normal stuff.
J* joins us for dinner every Saturday night and has since before either of my children (The Daughter and The Son) were born. Thus, they grew up getting to know J* in a very natural and organic manner. Neither The Husband nor I ever mentioned or discussed or explained J*’s handicap. He simply was. The children gradually figured out for themselves that their brother was special.
Having J* around every week (plus living with us for two weeks every sumer) has been a very special blessing for our family.
The Husband’s other three children have been blessings too. Any normal family of siblings would have completely rejected me. I was, after all, an interloper. The other woman. Their father and I caused their mother a great deal of pain, stress, and distress.
If I had been in their shoes I very likely would have not just rejected me but my children also.
Not The Husband’s children. They have each been amazing in their acceptance of me, of my relationship with their father, and of their half-siblings. And they aren’t simply civil. No, they’re genuinely kind and welcoming.
Their acceptance of me was not overnight, mind you. But even in the beginning there was no unkindness or expressed bitterness or resentment or anger.
When The Husband and I decided that we simply could not live without each other and, against all odds, decided to make a go of it, I swore a solemn oath to myself that I would never, ever get between The Husband and his children. It was not easy — being left alone on Thanksgiving and Christmas those first few years. But I was willing to make that sacrifice for the next 50 years, if necessary, to provide The Husband family time with his (adult) children.
Eventually, after The Daughter was born, and then The Son, his adult children started coming to our place for birthdays. My house was always open to them in whatever form and to whatever extent they felt comfortable.
Then, a year or so after The Son was born, The Husband’s grandchildren started to arrive. Christmas and birthdays took on a new dimension as their children and their half-siblings began interacting much the way cousins would.
Over time we created family holiday traditions that accommodated their mother and their dad. I always host shindings on Father’s Day, The Husband’s birthday, The Son and The Daughter’s birthdays, and Christmas.
None of these shared celebrations would have been possible without their kindness and generosity of spirit. The grandchildren and my children would not share the bonds of friendship and family love without their parents’ willingness and acceptance. The joy evident in The Husband as he basks in the company and chaos of this 6 children and 5 grandchildren would not exist without their forgiveness and love.
I am forever in awe of the way in which all of The Husband’s adult children have accepted and welcomed me. It is a true testament to both their father and mother (especially their mother) that they were capable of such a level of acceptance. I am blessed to have been allowed into their family.
$$: All The Usual Suspects
Posted on | December 1, 2008 | No Comments
Total Spent Today: $79.56
Ah, another day in suburbia; another day in the life of a suburban wife and mother.
Physical Therapy — $25.00
We started the day with a physical therapy session for The Son. His broken clavicle is healing nicely and PT is coming along nicely too. The therapist gave The Son several additional Range-of-Motion exercises as well as some strengthing exercises. He’ll go in again on Wednesday and from there we’ll evaluate whether or not we’ll do any more appointments.
Kroger Pharmacy — $10.00
While The Son was at PT, The Husband and I ran to pick up my synthroid prescription. We’re in the final countdown, now, until my long-awaited post-surgery appointment with my endocrinologist. He’s kept me on my previous thyroid-replacement dosage this whole time (since September 22) and I just can’t take it any more. I’m so incredibly hypothyroid; the fatigue literally burns.
Vitamin Cottage — $44.56
Our last quick stop on the way home where The Husband will drop us off before going back to work, leaving me without a vehicle for the rest of the day.
- Applegate sliced roast beef — $5.19
- Applegate organic smoked turkey — $5.49
- 2 Applegate Farms frozen chicken pot pies — $3.55/ea.
- Amy’s frozen broccoli cheese pot pie — $2.89
- Amy’s cheese pocket — $2.45
- FiberSmart 200ct fiber capsules — $19.39
I also put in a $300.00 automatic trade order with Sharebuilder. First, I transfered funds between my WaMu on-line savings account and my WaMu free checking. Then I put in the order on Sharebuilder. Assuming all goes as it should, Sharebuilder will purchase $300’s worth of GE stock for me tomorrow. The plan is for this to be my only Sharebuilder transaction in December. I’ve decided to make larger, slightly less frequent automatic investments in my Sharebuilder account to cut down on my transaction fees ($4 per trade). I’ll include the $300 expense in tomorrow’s spending total as it won’t actually be invested until then.
Tags: groceries > health > investing > medical > meds > physical therapy > The Son
Carnival of Family Life ~ Snowman edition
Posted on | December 1, 2008 | 11 Comments
Carnival of Family Life - Snowman edition
Welcome to the Snowman edition of the Carnival of Family Life. My thanks to Colloquium for allowing me the honor of hosting this week’s carnival.
Education
Shay presents Core Strength posted at The Life Without School Community Blog.
Melitsa presents Overlooked creative toy posted at Play-Activities.com.
Family Cooking & Recipes
Annette Berlin presents Oven-Baked Grilled Cheese Sandwich posted at Craft Stew. Annette says that this oven-baked sandwich tastes just like it was grilled in a frying pan.
Joanne presents Breakfast posted at Fun Easy Recipes For Kids.
HappyCampers presents Gifts To Make: Chocolate Lollipops posted at Reese’s View Of The World.
Aahz presents Live Blogging Thanksgiving 2008 at The Caverns posted at Philaahzophy, explaining that “this was the first year I’d ever cooked anything for Thanksgiving. That’s why my 12-year-old daughter Zaira and I live blogged the event.”
GrrlScientist presents America’s Food Availability Crisis posted at Living the Scientific Life, opining that “One thing the Thanksgiving holiday has made clear is that America, the land of plenty where holiday overeating is celebrated as a social good, is suffering from a food availability crisis.”
Helene Zemel presents Turkey Stuffing with Cinnamon Goodness posted at Health Plans Plus, offering “a delicious poultry stuffing recipe packed with cinnamon goodness for your holiday table . . . or any time! Cinnamon has been proven to assist with metabolizing glucose. The recipe can also be made into a delicious bread pudding.”
Family Crafts and Activities
Zaira presents Thanksgiving For 2: A Live Blog Post From Start To Finish posted at Butterfly Diaries, a “live blog post” from a 12-year-old girl about her first Thanksgiving with her father.
HowToMe presents How To Sew a Simple Purse, Tote or Bag posted at HowToMe.
Family Fiction
Jenn presents The Sentence posted at Mixed Metaphor.net, a fictional story in which two mothers experience a common reaction to a tragedy that impacts both of their lives.
Family Finance
Insurance Toolbox presents Types of Insurance Policies That You Shouldn’t Buy posted at Insurance Toolbox.
Polly Poorhouse presents University Resources for Kids posted at Economic Crunch. “Activities for kids don’t have to be expensive,” Polly writs. “See what your local university has to offer.”
Becca Glouzstein presents How to teach your kids about abundance while living frugally posted at Inspiration for Mothers.com.
Raymond presents The Best Christmas Credit Cards For Holiday Shopping posted at Money Blue Book.
Raymond presents Credit Card Offers For People With Bad Credit Or Poor Credit History posted at Money Blue Book.
Silicon Valley Blogger presents Toys R Us Coupons and Age Discrimination posted at The Digerati Life, saying, “Is there such a thing as “coupon discrimination”?”
freefrombroke presents Never Mind A New Economic Stimulus Package - Save Yourself! posted at Free From Broke, saying, “Many are hoping the gov’t will help bail out their financial problems. Don’t be one of them! Take control of your own finances.”
The Smarter Wallet presents Finish Your Holiday Shopping Early And Save Money! posted at The Smarter Wallet.
Family Health and Wellness
Shen-Li Lee presents Plastic Baby Bottles Banned! posted at Babylicious.
Chief Family Officer presents When to replace a car seat that’s been in an accident posted at Chief Family Officer.
Donald Latumahina presents Tip for a Healthy Heart – Drink Wine posted at Life Optimizer.
Megan Bayliss presents Prosperity Abundance in child protection posted at imaginif. “Community focused child protection is a preventative and enriching activity in which all of us can engage daily,” according to Megan. “When the term ‘child protection’ is turned on its head, it simply means ‘the protection of children.’”
Matthew presents Advance Medical Directives posted at Fast Medical Information, a beginning primer on advance directives which define the specific treatment preferences of an incompacitated patient, as well as designate a decision-maker who will speak in the event that the patient is unable to enunciate his/her own desires. Why do you need such a document? Read more about what could happen to your family at Robert’s Legacy.
Family Pets
GP presents Practice Without Anticipation « Manely Montana posted at Manely Montana. Life with horses provides life lessons.
GrrlScientist presents How To Stuff Your Parrot on Thanksgiving posted at Living the Scientific Life, an amusing essay again making the rounds.
Matt M presents Givaway - Grooming Essentials Kit posted at The Pet Haven.
Family Relationships and Self-Improvement
Hopeful Spirit presents Reflections on Holidays and Famlies: A Test of Character posted at On the Horizon.
Donetta presents On Family Relationships and Self-Improvement posted at A Life Uncommon.
![April [snow] Showers Bring Giant Snowmen](http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2285/2414022921_b0b5d65aee_m.jpg)
Mama Bear presents Christmas Traditions posted at I’ve Got a Little Space to Fill.
Toni presents And all I wanted to do was put my feet up posted at Wifely Steps, saying, “My husband nourishes me with more than just food. :)”
Terri Mauro presents High School Musical and the downside of dreaming posted at About Parenting Special Needs.
Super Saver presents Thankful for my Family posted at My Wealth Builder.
Family Spirituality/Belief/Worship
Allen Scott presents Be Thankful posted at A View from the Nest. “It’s easy to be thankful for the good things,” according to Allen. “A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks.”
Donetta presents Before and After Portrait posted at A Life Uncommon. “It is time to believe in yourself,” Donetta tells us.
Julie Heath presents Teaching Kids The Meaning of Christmas posted at More4kids.
Karen Shanley presents Running for the Train posted at Karen Shanley.
Family Travel
Marilyn Terrell presents Underwater Legoland posted at Intelligent Travel, about a trip to Sea Life, the underwater theme park at Legoland.
Shortcut Sleuth presents Surviving Family Road Trips posted at Shortcut Sleuth, offering a few pointers to make your next family trip a bit smoother by keeping the kids entertained.
Parenting Tips and Advice
Kevin presents Positive Role Models and Children posted at More4kids.
Emma presents Seven Things I Would Never Say To a New Mom posted at Baby-Log.
Kristina Kharlova presents Boston Common Christmas Tree posted at Boston Mama.
Melitsa presents Are you an effective counterweight? posted at Play-Activities.com.
Thank you all for participating in and supporting this edition of the Carnival!
Next week Carnival will be hosted at All Rileyed Up! If you would like to participate in next week’s edition of the Carnival, click here to submit the link to and relevant information about your posts. If you have questions, be sure to review the Carnival guidelines before submitting your posts.
Would you like the Carnival to pay a visit to your site? Check out the hosting schedule, select a date, and then drop a line advising what week you would like to host.
Photo Credits (in order of appearance):
photo credit: pshab- photo credit: tom.basham
- photo credit: g.naharro
- photo credit: Tesla314
- photo credit: neatlysliced
- photo credit: ianqui
- photo credit: Rose Davies
- photo credit: jcarwash31
- photo credit: KalleKarl
- photo credit: nameinuse
Counting My Blessings: #8
Posted on | November 30, 2008 | No Comments
If you’ve missed any of the first six posts (seven blessings) in this theme, you can check them out here:
- Blessing #1 — Connection to Nature and Universal Truths
- Blessing #2 — The Husband
- Blessing #3 — My Health
- Blessings #4 and 5 — My Children
- Blessing #6 — My Circumstances
- Blessing #7 — The Husband’s Health
Today’s blessing is my mom. My mother. The woman who brought me into this world; who cared for me and loved me and nurtured me into adulthood and beyond.
I am grateful to my mom for my upbringing. She raised me and my siblings on her own and through the years we saw some really tough times.
My mother is not a perfect woman and she’d be the first to admit it. But whom among us is? Still, there was never any question that we were always her top priority. I grew up knowing one thing for sure: my mom would have laid down her life for any one of us at any time.
My mother has many wonderful traits; many strengths and assets. She is generous — and not just financially. She’s generous with her time, her energy, her love, and her possessions. She’s kind and caring. She’s incredibly intelligent and creative and resilient and forgiving and tolerant and youthful and funny and talented. She’s empathic and understanding.
I am also incredibly grateful to my mom for being such a fabulous Grannie. She has enriched my children’s lives in countless ways and I can’t imagine their lives without her presence. My children would emphatically assure you that my mom is the greatest Grannie a kid could ask for. She dotes on her grandchildren and spoils them in all the right ways — with love and patience and time and her individual attention.
My mom and I are best friends. I love her. She is a true blessing in my life.
$$: Gas in the Tank
Posted on | November 30, 2008 | No Comments
Total Spent Today: $27.44
Safeway — $27.44
On the way home from church today, the kids and I stopped to tank up The Tank. I pumped 16.639 gallons at an amazing $1.649 per gallon. The odometer read 135,584.
I didn’t write a weekly offering check at church this morning because I forgot my checkbook.
Upcoming Carnival of Family Life
Posted on | November 30, 2008 | No Comments
Carnival of Family Life
Hi readers! I am so pleased (and equally terrified) to be hosting the upcoming Carnival of Family Life.
Please be sure to check back in tomorrow to read all of the excellent submissions.
If you’re not familiar with this particular carnival, the Carnival of Family Life is a large, well-established weekly carnival featuring articles about family-related issues. Each edition includes writings in twelve different categories:
- Parenting Tips and Advice
- Family Finance
- Family Health and Wellness
- Family Spirituality/Belief/Worship
- Family Humor
- Family Pets
- Education
- Family Fiction
- Family Travel
- Family Crafts and Activities
- Family Cooking & Recipes
- Family Relationships and Self-Improvement
Counting My Blessings: #7
Posted on | November 29, 2008 | 1 Comment
I didn’t post a “Counting My Blessings” post yesterday — I guess because Thanksgiving was over and everyone else had moved on to Black Friday and the big build-up to Christmas. But it isn’t sitting well with me — leaving off without counting all of my blessings. So, please bear with me as I continue to Count My Blessings.
In case you’ve missed any previous posts in this theme, here are my first six blessings:
- Blessing #1 — Connection to Nature and Universal Truths
- Blessing #2 — The Husband
- Blessing #3 — My Health
- Blessings #4 and 5 — My Children
- Blessing #6 — My Circumstances
Today I’d like to backtrack just a bit. Blessing #3 was My Health, for which I am very grateful and truly feel blessed. The Husband’s health, however, is also a blessing. Shoot, The Husband’s health isn’t just a blessing, it’s a miracle.
In early 1996 shortly before his 61st birthday, The Husband was diagnosed with Stage II prostate cancer. I don’t remember his Gleason score but it was in the mid- to high-range. It was determined that the best course of treatment would be to undergo a Radical Prostatectomy (removal of the entire prostate gland plus surrounding tissue). He underwent surgery in March. The surgeon pronounced the cancer contained and the surgery a success.
The Husband’s recovery was a bit slow, but complete. In those days, if a man lived 5 years past treatment, he was classified a “survivor.” The Husband made it 10 years before recurrence. But I’m getting ahead of myself in the story.
One Saturday in 1998, two years to the month after undergoing his Radical Prostatectomy, The Husband complained of terrible intestinal pain. We ended up in the ER where they decided to admit him and keep him overnight for observation. Early Sunday morning they decided to go in for emergency exploratory surgery.
They fully expected to find an intestinal adhesion caused by the surgery two years earlier. Instead, they found colo-rectal cancer. A full blockage of the lower intestine. They removed a foot of intestine, resectioned him, and sent him home. This time his recovery time was amazingly short. He was back at work in less than a week.
The Husband undergoes regular colonoscopies and, to date, the colon cancer has never recurred.
For the next eight years, The Husband plugged along, aging gracefully. Gradually other health issues arose but nothing too out-of-the-ordinary and nothing immediately life-threatening: slightly elevate blood pressure, slightly high cholesterol, some pre-diabetes indicators.
Then, in the spring of 2006, ten years after the initial prostate cancer diagnosis, The Husband’s prostate cancer suddenly returned. For years his PSA (prostate-specific antigen) level had been declared “undetectible” but now it was growing — at first, doubling every 4 months then quadrupling. A man without a prostate gland who registers a PSA (prostate-specific antigen) reading has prostate cancer, somewhere. The Husband underwent a number of tests to try to locate a tumor. None were found. The Husband’s doctor suggested hormone therapy. Almost immediately, The Husband’s PSA numbers were affected and they didn’t just slow or stop, they went back down. Down to nearly undetectible.
And that’s where we stand today. The Husband is 73. He’s a cross between the energizer bunny (keeps going and going and going) and a Timex watch (takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’). The Husband gets up every morning and goes to work and does what he does best: being a loving and dedicated family man whose number one job is to provide for his family.
This is a man who smoked or used some form of tobacco for almost 50 years. He’ll eat any meat as long as it’s beef and any vegetable as long as it’s a potato (preferably fried). He walks — to his car. Yet he’s survived cancer twice and never seen an oncologist.
I don’t know how else to view it — The Husband’s continued good health is a blessing, to our entire family.
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Half of any income earned through this blog will be donated to charity. The other half will be put into my children's college funds.
