Reaching Out to my Readers for Advice

I got such great feed­back on my bas­ket­ball shoe dilemma that I’m turn­ing to my read­ers with another puzzle.

The Son takes weekly cello lessons. His teacher is a young man who recently com­pleted his grad­u­ate degree in music per­for­mance. He’s ter­rific — not just in gen­eral as a music teacher but also in that he’s a per­fect fit for my quirky-might-have-Asperger’s son. The teacher never takes offense at The Son’s lack of com­mu­ni­ca­tion or eye-contact and doesn’t lose patience with him when it’s obvi­ous that not much energy went into prac­tic­ing that week. In addi­tion, on the odd occa­sion when the next stu­dent is late or absent, the teacher has extended The Son’s 45-minute les­son to an hour with­out ask­ing for addi­tional pay.

Each 45-minute les­son costs $26.25 and we don’t pay for weeks dur­ing which The Son does not have a les­son. So, my ques­tion is this: how much and in what form should we give the teacher as a Christmas/appreciation gift/bonus?

– opin­ions of tutors or private-lesson teach­ers are par­tic­u­larly appre­ci­ated but all feed­back and opin­ions are welcome –

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5 Comments

  1. Vanessa
    Posted November 12, 2007 at 3:48 pm | Permalink

    A won­der­ful gift would be some­thing like home­made cook­ies, hot choco­late mix, and a mug, or some­thing along those lines; things which are “homey” and per­sonal are great for young pri­vate teach­ers. Those were the kind of things my par­ents and I did for my cello teacher grow­ing up (yay! for cel­lists) and things I have thor­oughly enjoyed receiv­ing from my stu­dents that I tutor. Have fun!

    http://www.vanessa.hoozh.net

  2. Rachel
    Posted November 12, 2007 at 9:32 pm | Permalink

    I’m all for either con­sum­ables or cash/gift cards. It really depends on if there’s any rela­tion­ship estab­lished. If you know he has some sort of food like or is a foodie, some­thing yummy and gourmet-ish (choco­late dipped bis­cotti (can make at home), etc.) would be dandy.

    If you know his inter­ests out­side of music, a gift card would be great.

    And I’m one of those peo­ple who does think cash can be appro­pri­ate — often peo­ple who tutor/teach or pro­vide a ser­vice really appre­ci­ate mon­e­tary acknowl­edge­ment. I debated on this one for this year — I have a mas­sage ther­a­pist I’ve been going to once a month and I didn’t know what to do for Christ­mas. I ago­nized over it, really. I wanted to get her some­thing other than cash, but I couldn’t think of what would be *really* appre­ci­ated that wouldn’t poten­tially be a waste and/or chucked in the yard­sale pile. I also know she’s cut back on her hours, so I’m sure money could go to use. I’ll gift her what I usu­ally pay for a mas­sage plus tip.

  3. Elizabeth
    Posted November 12, 2007 at 10:42 pm | Permalink

    @ Vanessa — Thanks for your input. [yay! cel­lists] I like your idea of some­thing homey and per­sonal and The Son is really into cook­ing and bak­ing right now. We’ll brain­storm and come up with a treat he can make.

    @ rachel — I, too, think that cash can be quite appro­pri­ate. My mom is a body worker (beyond mas­sage, many modal­i­ties includ­ing cranio-sacral) and I know that cash is not only appre­ci­ated but some­times very much needed ;-)

    The teacher and his wife are young, both just out of col­lege, most likely have stu­dent loan debt, and live in a small apart­ment. I don’t know what they eat or what they like. I had thought of a gift card but then decided that cash might be most appre­ci­ated — it gives him and his wife the most lee­way in decid­ing for them­selves how to spend it. But how much? One les­son seems a bit pid­dly, doesn’t it? Two lessons? $50 and a home­made treat?

  4. Rachel
    Posted November 13, 2007 at 2:00 pm | Permalink

    I think $50 and a nice home­made yummy treat sounds fab­u­lous, and will be well received!!

  5. Elizabeth
    Posted November 13, 2007 at 10:06 pm | Permalink

    Thanks, Rachel! That’s such a load off my mind — I’ve been puz­zling over this for a cou­ple of weeks ;-)

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