Four Things I’ll NEVER Buy

Posted on | September 10, 2007 |

I surfed by Stop Buying Crap today and found these two funny, yet thought-provoking, posts: Four Things I’ll NEVER Buy and Four MORE Things I Won’t Ever Buy.

So I’ve decided to write my own version of this list. Here are four things I’ll NEVER Buy:

cleavage Boobs. I put the “flat” in flat-chested and that’s just fine with me. My minimal mammary glands were more than enough to provide nutrition to both of my babies — each for nearly 3 years. I even tandem nursed during the 6 months of overlap between when The Son was born and The Daughter weaned herself. If it were up to me I would have blessed myself with a little more in the boob department but I’d never for a second consider butchering my body to insert foreign objects into it. Even if the surgery were free. Not even if someone paid me to do it.

bling Bling of any type. I’ve got a simple gold wedding band and a beautiful, simple strand of pearls that my mother handed down. That’s all the jewelry or bling that I will ever need.

cable logo Premium cable. Due to the cable monopoly situation in our area and my admitted addiction to high-speed internet access, Comcast is a necessary evil in our household. But adding another $50.00 to our monthly bill so we can have access to more channels? No way! I’d sure back up an a la carte idea, though. I’d love to have the History channel, Animal Planet, and USA. But those channels ain’t even close to being worth $50/mo.

tattoo A tattoo. Truth be told, I do understand the appeal. But I’d never, ever, under any circumstances, get one. And I’ve made it very clear to both of my kids that they are free to get tattoos as long they intend to be completely financially independent afterward. Why? Because the idea of permanently altering one’s body is abhorrent to me. Yes, my ears are pierced but it’s been years since I wore earrings. Yes, my daughter’s ears are pierced (more on that decision some other time perhaps) and, yes, she wears earrings occasionally. And yes, I’d probably let The Son get his ear(s) pierced at some point if he really wanted to. He has absolutely no interest, though, so maybe that’s just a chicken-sh*t faux open-minded attitude.